What if I told you that the vampire kids who hang out in the back of the grocery store are actual vampires? Like, blood-sucking and flying bats and stuff. No, no, no, I’m not messing. Seriously. Why don’t you guys believe me? You never believe me!
I’ve seen them at night and I’m telling you I was lucky to get out of there. You know, I always thought, like, ‘Where are their parents’? But, now I know that probably they’re actually maybe hundreds of years old or something. Saw the Mayflower or something. Or even the dinosaurs or something…
I’ve never seen them in class. You know? Like, think about it. Ever seen them in the sun? I think they just chill in the shade of the building until night and then maybe they go out and catch other kids and bite them to have more vampire kids. That’s what I’d do. More friends that way. Or maybe they just eat rats or something. I don’t know. I was watching behind a fence. I didn’t get a good look.
Do you think they can hear us right now? I feel like bats have good hearing because of echo-locomotion and all of that, right? Maybe we should whisper?
Maybe we should be very very quiet always just in case…
You know… I saw a bat land on one of their hands and they sang a very scary song. The kids, not the bat. But maybe the bat was singing too. I was very far away. Anything’s possible.
They were wearing capes and they… they could fly a little. Just a few feet off the ground.
I wonder what it would be like to be a kid like that forever. Never getting your driver’s permit. I don’t think I’d like it very much.
I’ve seen them